The next day I woke up in my coffin. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end and a matching top with red skulls all over it and high heeled boots that were black. I put on two pairs of skull earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple.
In the Great Hall, I ate some Count Chocula cereal with blood instead of milk, and a glass of red blood. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the blood spilled over my top.
“Bastard!” I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic boy with spiky black hair with red streaks in it. He was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down his face and he was wearing black lipstick. He didn’t have glasses anymore and now he was wearing red contact lenses just like Draco’s and there was no scar on his forhead anymore. He had a manly stubble on his chin. He had a sexy English accent. He looked exactly like Joel Madden. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I’m a girl so I didn’t get one you sicko.
“I’m so sorry.” he said in a shy voice.
“That’s all right. What’s your name?” I questioned.
“My name’s Harry Potter, although most people call me Vampire these days.” he grumbled.
“Why?” I exclaimed.
“Because I love the taste of human blood.” he giggled.
“Well, I am a vampire.” I confessed.
(via conversatron)
December 2011
FAT PEOPLE? WELL NOW LET ME TELL YOU MY OPINION
Amanda Palmer | Have to Drive
dump herpaige is attracted to him
- tosh.0 is the dumbest thing ever
in order to cheer santana up, the glee club decides to console her by singing a song that exploits female homosexuality as titillation for straight men. as this happens, the straight men in the glee club ogle the girls sensuously stroking each other which totally doesn’t straight-up make a mockery of santana’s orientation or anything
and finn sings a song that has literally no relevance to anything and hopes no one will notice if he sings it soulfully enough
naya rivera is flawless but she cannot save this show
I kissed a girl is right up there as one of the most insulting and disgusting numbers glee has ever done so
yeah
this episode is so bad christ
don’t know any alanas, sorry
so there’s this guy at my school named zachary and he has like asperger’s and tourettes and so he can act up quite a bit
and one time he pulled the fire alarm and tore off down the hallway and we had to explain to the teachers that it wasn’t us and it was distressing but funny
once upon a time you were the only person I have ever met with this name so
November 2011
I just saw an advertisement for a new sandwich at wendy’s called “the w”
the tagline was “now everybody has a new favourite letter”
you know
because you had a favourite letter before you heard about this sandwich
The Dresden Dolls | Mrs. O
Had this song in my head the whole day!
On the Bus Mall - The Decemberists
hey have I ever posted a video of myself
would that be cool or just obnoxious
Joanna Newsom | Colleen
“omg im so awkward” comments a dimly self-aware fungus while recounting a week spent moldering a granny smith apple.
hey so why not ask me stuff
I don’t have skyward sword so I’m playing twilight princess to make myself feel better
so my stepfather was like “jesse can you clean the entire house or wait are you going out?” so I said “um YES in fact I just on my way out so sorry nothing I can do”
I decided to go to the library even though none of my holds were in but season two of breaking bad was just sitting there on a shelf even though I requested it like a week ago so I grabbed it yay awesome
and also they had micmacs so now I can get my jeunet on yes yes yes
me - 1, universe - 0
I put season two of breaking bad and the brothers bloom on hold and neither of them are at the library yet christ
hard knock life 2011
Arcade Fire | Sprawl II (Mountains Beyond Mountains)
No yoghurt is disgusting what are you doing.
oh god yogurt is so good and creamy and smooth and you can add fruit and what is wrong with you
vanilla yogurt with fresh blackberries aw yeah aw yeah
jesse why what omg
things I want to do
- make comics / cartoons
- write for a television show
- write a film
- direct episodes of a television show / a film
- make posters for things
- write, direct, and perhaps act in plays
- paint things
- write short stories and novels
Regina Spektor | Loveology
oh, an incurable humanist you are
Queens is my #1 school but I don’t have my marks where they should be yet. Have you toured it? It’s beautiful.
oh my god don’t even talk to me about marks I have a 76 in drawing this is unacceptable
I haven’t been to any campuses yet because I don’t know I’m a moron I guess
